Couples Therapy in English

What couples therapy is

Couples therapy is a process in which partners work on the difficulties in their relationship together, with a therapist. The aim is not to decide who is right. It is to understand the needs underneath the arguments and find ways to reach each other again.

The therapist does not take sides. In couples therapy the client is the relationship, and both partners need to feel heard and safe for the work to move forward.

Common reasons couples come

• The same argument, again: The topic changes but the fight always ends up in the same place. One partner pushes, the other withdraws.
• Drifting apart: Talking only about logistics, feeling lonely while living together.
• Broken trust: After an affair or a secret, working out whether and how trust can be rebuilt.
• Before marriage: Talking openly about expectations, families, money and daily life before committing.
• Becoming parents: The distance and the division of work that can follow a new baby.
• Deciding whether to stay: Reaching a clearer decision, or separating with less harm.

Intercultural and bilingual couples

When partners come from different countries, ordinary disagreements can carry extra weight. Some of this weight is tied to culture and language:

• Different expectations: about family involvement, gender roles, money or how conflict should sound.
• The language gap: One partner may always be arguing in a second language, which can make them feel less articulate and less understood.
• Family pressure: Relatives on one or both sides may have strong views about the relationship.

Sessions can be held in English, in Turkish or in a mix of the two, so that neither partner is always at a disadvantage. Part of the work is noticing which conflicts are about the two of you and which are about the different worlds you grew up in.

How I work

The first sessions are for assessment: the history of the relationship, its strengths and where it gets stuck. Then we set shared goals. I draw on cognitive behavioural techniques and research-based principles of couples therapy.

In sessions we look closely at how arguments start and escalate. We practise a way of talking in which both partners can actually hear each other, and then carry it into daily life between sessions.

What the process looks like

1. A joint first session to understand the relationship and what brings you.
2. Individual sessions where useful, so each partner can speak freely about their own view.
3. Shared goals that both partners agree on.
4. Regular sessions of about 90 minutes, at a frequency we plan together.

When joint sessions are not the right step

If there is physical violence, threats, or one partner does not feel safe in the relationship, safety comes first. In that case individual support and the necessary referrals are arranged instead of joint sessions. If there is immediate danger, call 112.

In person or online

Sessions take place in person in Istanbul or online. Partners are encouraged to join online sessions from the same room.